Digital Scryer

In this part, I’m going to talk about a couple touchy subjects, one of which applies to me: Child Support and Alimony.

These are things a lot of people have trouble with, mostly because they don’t trust their ex to use the money for the children. It took me awhile to realize that child support wasn’t so that the ex had a few hundred extra dollars a month to spend on drugs or booze or whatever, it was to improve her and therefore my daughter’s quality of life, even if just a little.

You see, she could spend 200 bucks a month of her money on cigarettes, for example, and use the child support to pay for things for your children, or use the child support/alimony to buy cigarettes and spend HER money on the children. Either way both are accomplished, she’s happy which hopefully means the babies will be better off.

You CAN’T save money on this. I can understand not wanting to pay either, but you’ve got to. If you’re making money here in BC, Canada, you pay a percentage of your income. It’s the right thing to do and if you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime. I’ve seen too many deadbeat dads and I’d hate to think any of my readers would lower themselves to that. Little guilt trip for ya .

Anyway, to avoid ever having to pay things like this, a few points are important. USE CONTRACEPTION OR ABSTAIN. I now firmly believe you should only have children with someone you’re married to or have made a long term commitment to and have been with for a number of years. That way the chances of ever having kids to end up in this situation will be far less.

If you’re getting married, and many people have trouble with this, get a prenuptial agreement. NOTHING is certain in this world, you guys may have tons of love for one another and think “This is never going to end, prenups are just an insulting waste of time.” Not so.

Feelings change constantly for EVERYONE, it’s human nature. Your relationships will grow and change and you may decide that someday you don’t want to be together anymore. In this case a prenuptial agreement is important, so that not only can one spouse not take the other for half or more of everything said spouse has earned, but they can also be constructed so as to not have alimony tacked on. I know many traditionalists who will disagree with that, but if you marry someone and it doesn’t work out, do you want to have to finance their life forever so they don’t have to work as much or at all? Didn’t think so.

I also think that people should only get married on equal footing, so that if one spouse never went to school and has no job or training they won’t completely end up with the shaft. If you’re going to get married, make sure you’re compatible. Some of the happiest couples never wed, Kurt Russel and Goldie Hawn for instance.

So as outlined above, whether you agree with me completely or not, plan everything out when it’s THIS important. I don’t mean to come off sounding preachy or like a marriage counselor, but I’m firmly of the opinion that it’s not to be taken lightly, bringing a life into this world, or changing your life by adding someone to it (hopefully) for good.

Part 1
Part 2